In the Year 3064 of Our Lady of Discord the following came to pass :

On 13th of Chaos did a great shadow fall upon the life of the First Speaker, as he was cast out from his Day Job unto the Abyss of Unemployment. There he did Frolic joyfully, having cast off the Chains of Work, until the cash ran out and he Began to Bitch mightily of about his Cruel Fate.

On the 44th of Chaos the First Speaker did join Tanya Telson and Peter Wilcox in Holy, if not legal, matrimony. Their vows are herein recorded for those foolish enough to wish to do the same.